Whew, 2020 has been a hell of a year – and we’re not even halfway through it. In my wildest dreams I never could’ve imagined we’d be swept up in the storms of panic and rage that have ensued following the outbreak of the Coronavirus and the tragic death of George Floyd. It’s like we’re living in some sort of dystopian alternate reality, and I find myself bracing day-to-day wondering what the fuck is going to happen next.
Then a literal storm hit us this weekend, and I thought, yeah…that’s about fucking right. -_-
Full disclosure: I only halfway pay attention to current events these days because quite frankly my nerves can’t handle it. I’ve been in crisis mode for about 4 solid years now, and the escalating toxicity of the media is something I no longer have any tolerance to withstand. Everything is increasingly about hype and clicks and decreasingly about reporting on the facts. I remember a time when the news was boring, and that was okay! The news is supposed to be boring and dry for the most part because it’s supposed to be an unbiased accounting of, you know, actual events.
Now, it’s like the truth is some sort of mythical creature we have to hunt for through jungles of misinformation and bias, guided only by our own best judgment and armed with worryingly increasing cynicism.
So yeah. Since all the media ever does is cry wolf over everything, when I heard that a tropical storm was brewing out in the Gulf of Mexico, I didn’t pay it much mind. I live in the Southern U.S., along the gulf coast. I’m from this general area, and I’ve been through plenty of storms. This one, Cristobal, seemed like a small fry in comparison to some of the others.
But like I said, it’s always the things you’d never imagine…
The tree you see snapped clean in half in the first photo is a large mature oak tree that we believe was struck by lightning some years back, which conceivably weakened it enough for torrential rains and a sudden strong gust of wind to do it in. And the house you see this tree resting upon in the second photo is our house, which we’ve lived in for a grand total of about 6 months now.
So our brand-new roof got punctured, the room where we sleep has been uninhabitable due to water damage, and our entire backyard is currently filled up with oak tree. But as strange as it is, I haven’t taken a new nose-dive into depression over this latest and greatest cosmic fuck-you. I don’t know whether it’s just that my capacity to be depressed has finally been maxed out, and now I’m in some weird state of purgatorial apathy – or maybe this disaster just happened to hit home in a perversely good way. Like a slap to the face to snap me out of it, or something like that.
Who knows. But what I’m feeling right now more than anything is a profound sense of gratitude – gratitude to the universe that the tree fell the way it did and didn’t smash our house to pieces, gratitude that in the midst of a storm my boyfriend and neighbors weren’t hurt when they had to climb up on that steep slippery roof to patch the holes, and as stupid as it is, gratitude for this little miracle…
It’s hard to see against all that green leafy debris, but in the middle of that picture – in the middle of all that carnage – my little tomato plant that I decided to grow on a whim back in April somehow miraculously survived the tree fall. And even with one tiny tomato still attached 🙂 I don’t know for sure if the plant will make it, but I’m just so thankful that so far it has. I’m tearing up just thinking about it, which is ridiculous, I know. But I love that fucking plant, and although there was every likelihood that it would’ve been smashed flat in the chaos, somehow it wasn’t.
And that gives me hope for the future like you wouldn’t believe <3
I’m sorry things have been so tough for you. It’s definitely been a tumultuous and dark period in our country, but I too am hopeful these events had to happen and they will ultimately lead to a better and more equal future.
Thank you, Alex 🙂 I’m very hopeful for that too, and very thankful despite everything because I know so many people out there have had a much tougher time than I have 🙁
My heart goes out to them, and to you, and to everyone. We’re all in this together <3
I’m sorry for your storm damage, and other tribulations. Grateful for your sturdy little tomato plant. Having tribulations of my own…your little mater inspires me too.
Stay safe!
Thanks so much, girl 🙂 Sending love and positive thoughts your way! <3
Take care!!
I am glad truly that you and your boyfriend are unharmed, that no one was hurt and you are right this year has been very rocky in many aspects.
And also that the damage was not “that” extensive because a bloody oak tree falling is something not that common…. is the insurance going to enter into the repairs ? I truly hope so because they are always puting puting but’s and if’s; It is annoying.
I’m glad mostly that you are thinking the way that you do, being glad for the things you have, for your plant that made you reconsider many aspects of your life.
In my case the only bloody thing that helped this quarantine is the time I am spending with my family….is priceless.
Do you need any help? … by paypal or something…I’m not trying to be nosy im only worried.
Be safe!!!
Thanks so much, Mari! I truly appreciate all the kind words and support <3
Yes, I'm so beyond grateful that no one was hurt!! That is such a blessing, and I'm finding more and more that it helps so much to try to see the good in the bad. It makes me happy to hear that spending more time with your family is the good thing for you that's come out of all this quarantine craziness 🙂
As far as the damage goes, I think we're going to just pay for the repairs ourselves w/o dealing with the insurance. Thanks so much again for the offer of support! Fortunately we've managed to stay employed through this crisis, so I think we'll be fine, but I appreciate the gesture <3
Take care, friend!! <3 <3
Char, im glad that you are passing that rough patch smoothly! And that you have your job!! Both of you.. in this crisis many became unemployed , I’m praying for that to pass….all this crisis to pass…
Take care be safe !! Sending love and best wishes!!
<3 <3 <3
Omg, I cried reading this! Sending positive vibes your way. Keep on keepin’ on!
Thank you, mim!! :’) Sending love and positivity your way too! <3 <3
I’m really sorry that things have been so hectic. Hope the insurance company can fix everything. Sending peaceful thoughts and support.
Thanks, friend!! 🙂 Fortunately we were able to get the roof fixed today by a guy referred to us by our neighbors (so hopefully that means no more rain coming in!) Still need to repair the attic and the bedroom ceiling, but hopefully after that we’ll be in the clear damages wise and can focus on tree removal. That’s gonna be a beast in and of itself… though we won’t be quite so under the gun to get it done
Really appreciate the thoughts & support! <3 <3 <3
Oh Char I’m so glad you and your boyfriend are safe and no one was hurt. Those storms are nasty scary. Used to live outside Houston and I remember watching a huge Oak getting uprooted and thrown across the yard. I can see your tomato – that’s a glimmer of hope! Glad that you found someone to fix the roof. Be super careful with the tree removal as it can be very dangerous.
We were talking at work (on a conference call not in person) about how we’re living through an event that will go down in history books, and especially in the US where there is not only a pandemic with it’s resulting economic shit show, but finally long overdue civil rights protests that I truly hope lead to reform and change. Hard to stay positive during this but hoping we all come out on the other side stronger, wiser and more tolerant.
Stay well and let me know if you need anything – even if it’s more anime recommendations – I’m happy to oblige!! I found the Gokusen anime on YouTube and binged it in ONE night lol!!! I love the opening theme. There was also a live action TV show, and I tried to watch, but it just didn’t have the same charm. The actress playing Yamaguchi (Yankumi lol) was pretty decent but the pacing seemed off and they changed a lot of stuff, including making the clan lawyer she crushes on into a cop. (To play up the “oh no she’s Yakuza and he’s a cop” wah wah thing.) The actor playing Shin was a total babe, so might be worth watching just for him!
“Hard to stay positive during this but hoping we all come out on the other side stronger, wiser and more tolerant.” – this is my hope too! <3
Thanks so much for the support and encouragement, Molly!! 🙂 You're so right about the dangers of tree removal...luckily my boyfriend has quite a bit of experience with it, otherwise there's no way we'd be attempting it ourselves! Still, it makes me nervous...
That's so crazy about the tree you saw get uprooted in Houston! I happened to live there for a couple of years, and still haven't seen a place flood so fast D: (and this was before Hurricane Harvey...! 🙁 )
Ahh, yeah the Gokusen anime is really good! Now I can't remember if I've watched the whole thing, so I'll have to check it out on Youtube - thanks for letting me know it's out there! I think I tried to watch the live action show at one point, but I must have felt the same way...sometimes animated series just don't translate as well to live action shows (like ATLA LOL). That said, I do like looking at pretty men hehe <3 <3