Kagome’s face fell. “…What are you saying?”
“Isn’t it obvious?” Inuyasha shrugged. “He used you. He took advantage of you just to get one over on me.”
“No.” Kagome balled her fists, shook her head. “No, I don’t believe that.”
“Why?” Inuyasha sneered. “Because he told you he didn’t? Because he told you he ‘loved you’?” He scoffed. “Don’t be so naïve. He’s a thousand-year-old demon, Kagome. He does whatever he wants. Says whatever he wants. He’ll tell you anything, just to get his way.” Her hand rose to the mating mark on her neck, and Inuyasha turned up his nose in disdain. “You think that fucking bite mark means something? Gimme a break. Didn’t it occur to you that he could just kill you and Shin at any time, and he’d be free to mate someone more suitable?”
Kagome stood up from the bench. “You really think he’s that callous? That heartless and petty.”
Inuyasha scowled. “I’ve only got centuries’ worth of experience to back me up. Do you know when I was a kid he used to fuck with me like that, just for the hell of it? He’d come down out of the sky like some sort of fucking god. He’d gather me up from whatever hole I was hiding in. He’d smile down at me and say to me, ‘Little brother.’ And I’d think, this was it—that he’d finally decided to love me and to keep me—and then you know what he would do? He’d drop me in the sea, or in some dark pit. He’d get my hopes up just to dash them, just to rub it in my face. Just to show me that I was nothing but a thorn in his side. That I didn’t deserve to breathe the same air as him, let alone share the same father.”
“He’s changed,” Kagome insisted.
“Yeah,” Inuyasha said witheringly. “He’s gotten better at it.”
Kagome searched his stubborn expression. She knew then when she looked at him that he had already made up his mind. That she was innocent, and Sesshoumaru was guilty. That she had only ever been a pawn in some twisted game of his, some personal vendetta. This was Inuyasha’s final verdict on the matter.
Even as she was thinking it, he said it, “You can argue with me that he’s not every bit the ruthless demon that he seems. But don’t you get it? Just the fact that you’d argue his case proves my point—that he’s gotten to you in order to get to me.”
Kagome was quiet for a while. Meditative. Raising her eyes to Inuyasha’s, she said, “Why didn’t you ever do it? Put your mark on me.”
Inuyasha bristled, glaring at her. “Because it’s wrong to me, the idea of branding you like that. I wanted you to be my wife, not my slave.”
As Kagome had suspected, Inuyasha saw it like she did. From a human standpoint, the concept of the mating mark repulsed them both. Based on his words just now, the implications of it terrified her—just as she’d feared they would. But Sesshoumaru had never used the mark to oppress her. And all the same she wondered…
“Didn’t you ever want to, though? In the heat of the moment? To make me yours forever?”
Inuyasha gaped. “I—that—that’s not the point!”
His face blanched white, then blazed red. Kagome decided to let the subject drop.
“Even if it’s pointless to say this to you, I still need to say it,” she said, meeting him square in the eye. “I don’t believe that I was some victim in all this. I don’t believe that Sesshoumaru used me like you say he did. I don’t believe that he doesn’t love me and Shin. I can’t believe it. I refuse to believe that the father of my son is an unfeeling monster. And as for my feelings for him,” she said, taking a deep, bracing breath, “I won’t deny them, either. I can’t.”
Inuyasha straightened his spine, peering down at her. Once again, Kagome had the sense he’d not only expected this response from her, but he’d inured himself to it. His defenses were far stronger, ran far deeper, than she could ever have imagined. How many times had his heart callused over? So much suffering. So much betrayal. And yet he’d held on to his humanity, in spite of it all. Kagome’s own human heart ached for him, as ever it had.
“Yeah?” Inuyasha said, his eyes glinting back at her, undaunted. “Well, if he loves you so damn much, then where is he?”
Kagome eyed him grimly. “I’d have thought you’d know the answer to that.”
Inuyasha’s expression darkened. “I tried to track him down, all right,” he muttered. “Couldn’t find him anywhere. Wherever he is, it’s a long fucking way from here.”
Kagome glanced away, her heart sinking.
“But here I am.”
Kagome looked back at him. With Goshinboku behind him and the moonlight casting his features into a fey, boyish glow, she felt herself transported briefly, back to the beginning.
The kitchen door opened behind them. Inuyasha and Kagome turned toward it together. Mrs. Higurashi ventured out onto the porch, as though some motherly sixth sense had informed her that she should.
“Can I get you two anything?”
Kagome exchanged a mild glance with Inuyasha.
“Yeah,” he said, stepping toward the house. “I could sure go for some chocolate milk.”
Inuyasha © Rumiko Takahashi
“Yeah?” Inuyasha said, his eyes glinting back at her, undaunted. “Well, if he loves you so damn much, then where is he?”
Oh, we were all thinking it, but it hurts all the same! I like the little bit about the chocolate milk too. He and Shin have the same preferences. It’s interesting that Inuyasha seems to be justifying this as Kagome being just a pawn instead of a more willing player. And I suppose she could have been. We don’t want to believe that Sess was manipulating her all this time because of the flashbacks where he’s obviously pining for her in her own right. Just getting another one over on Inuyasha was probably more of a perk than the driving force. Nonetheless, I’m guessing we might see that reconciliation between these two, as fleeting as it possibly might be. I think you did a good job with this chapter! Looking forward to more.
“I like the little bit about the chocolate milk too. He and Shin have the same preferences.” – thanks, Tsuyoku! 🙂
So glad you enjoyed the chapter! <3
Color me surprised. Was not expecting to doubt my understanding of events.
Haha yeah it’s a tangled web for sure <3 Thanks for sharing!
” But here I am”
for a sec i thought future sesshoumaru said that…. and was gonna spring out of nowhere. T_T
meanwhile…. inuyasha is so calm about this. now im wondering does sesshoumaru even love her but it seemed like he does just fed up with her taking so long to tell inuyasha.
“for a sec i thought future sesshoumaru said that…. and was gonna spring out of nowhere. T_T” – aww yeah, sorry Kimiko ;_;
Thanks for sharing your thoughts on the scene! <3
Damn, now i want some chocolate milk lol. My heart of hearts kept hoping that Sess would suddenly appear now that he’s tied to her and Shin, allowing him to transport through the well. There’s something in my eye….😭
“Damn, now i want some chocolate milk lol. ” – hahaha i know right?? It’s so good! XD
Thanks for sharing, L-desu!! <3
From a human standpoint, the concept of the mating mark repulsed them both. Based on his words just now, the implications of it terrified her—just as she’d feared they would. But Sesshoumaru had never used the mark to oppress her. And all the same she wondered…“Didn’t you ever want to, though? In the heat of the moment? To make me yours forever?”Inuyasha gaped. “I—that—that’s not the point!” His face blanched white, then blazed red. Kagome decided to let the subject drop.
I don’t believe Inuyasha when he says he never wanted to mark her because he wanted her as a wife not a slave, that is not the true reason why he didn’t want to mark her. Your description of him first turning white and then blazed red is evidence of that. He could of communicated the purpose of the mark and its significants but he has never explained that to her. The mark is also supposed to be protective. If he would have explain the significants of the mark and then told her it is your choice if you want me to mark you, but he didn’t do that either. The way she said “To make me yours forever?” Is so sad because it implies that he doesn’t love her as much as he thinks he does. Their marriage is oppressive to them both, but more so to Kagome because he does in certain chapters treats her like a slave.
In Chapter 15:
Kagome tensed as Inuyasha’s claws curved around the back of her neck, dragging her closer to him. “…See how she looks at him,” he muttered sourly. “Why don’t you look at me that way?” She swallowed anxiously as his grip tightened. Before she could stop him, he was ripping out her hairpins. Her long locks tumbled down her shoulders as the chopsticks clattered to the floor. “That’s better.” His claws fisted in the tangled fall of her hair. “I hate having to look at that filthy scar on your neck…it pisses me off, knowing you let some bastard put his fangs in you.” Kagome tensed further. “Stop it, Inuyasha…you’re just drunk.” “Maybe I am.” His lips twisted in scorn as he lifted the sake to his mouth again. “Or maybe you’re just a whore.”
“You can go home when I say you can,” her husband returned lowly, catching her by the chin and steering her roughly back. “Look at me.”“That’s because you’re mine,” he rumbled. Kagome winced as he increased the pressure of his hold. “If you ever look at another man…I’ll tear you apart.”
“Inuyasha…” she said tremulously. His claws dug deeper into her skin. “…Inuyasha, you’re scaring me.” His jaw clenched. His eyes gleamed with sorrow even as he made her whimper in pain. “…Good.”
I am glad she has confessed her feelings for Sesshoumaru and I am not surprised that Inuyasha was not surprised that she loves Sesshoumaru. Now Inuyasha is sowing doubt in Kagome, I feel he has the mentality of if I can’t have you then no one can type of thing. Another great chapter yay! 🙂
“If he would have explain the significants of the mark and then told her it is your choice if you want me to mark you, but he didn’t do that either. ” – yep, love that you point this out. Sess may not have been up front about the mark, but Inuyasha’s silence on it is the other side of the coin 😉
Love hearing your analysis on the scene, Badtzmaru! So glad you enjoyed the chapter <3
Ahh, that famous ‘it’s always about punishing me’ paranoia from Inuyasha. Not that he’s entirely wrong, but it’s not exactly factual either. How many of Sesshoumaru’s perceived ‘attacks’ during Inuyasha’s childhood were brutal lessons (by mortal standards) to encourage growth? He survived, didn’t he?–and was stronger for it, too. I’m reminded of Sesshoumaru’s harsh method of teaching infant Shin to swim by pushing him into the pool.
Sesshoumaru is a manipulative strategist and would have killed Inuyasha a long time ago if his demise was truly a goal.
Inuyasha’s response regarding the mating mark is suspicious and there’s an awful lot he isn’t saying because, I suppose, it’s easier to deflect blame than to gauge the balance of one’s own feelings and choices.
“…because, I suppose, it’s easier to deflect blame than to gauge the balance of one’s own feelings and choices.” – very true…
Yeah it always struck me from the original canon that Sess never really seems to want to kill Inuyasha. It’s intriguing…
Love hearing your thoughts on the scene, friend! <3
Okay okay but him blanching at the mate thing I’m wondering if maybe he already had a mate? Or has one? I dunno I love Inu I do but I don’t take know how I feel about his explanation! I feel like if there was a way to keep her with him always he would do that at all mean with how possessive he is over her. For example when he got all mad when she was in that pretty kimono, I think he said something along the lines that he’d kill any other man that touched her so I ain’t buying his nice guy act just yet!
I need Sess so show up!!
Yep there’s some inconsistencies, that’s true – whether it can be chalked up to drunken bullshit on his part or not is hard to say…I certainly wouldn’t want to be in Kagome’s shoes haha
Thanks for sharing, Becky! <3
I know what he is. Main character experiencing main character syndrome + cuckolded husband + tragic white-haired anime guy triple whammy
When he comes out of this and realizes the truth, I think he’ll either explode or break down entirely 🥲
“Main character experiencing main character syndrome + cuckolded husband + tragic white-haired anime guy triple whammy” – ahaha what a cocktail! XD
Thanks for sharing, friend! <3
Inuyasha scowled. “I’ve only got centuries’ worth of experience to back me up. Do you know when I was a kid he used to fuck with me like that, just for the hell of it? He’d come down out of the sky like some sort of fucking god. He’d gather me up from whatever hole I was hiding in. He’d smile down at me and say to me, ‘Little brother.’ And I’d think, this was it—that he’d finally decided to love me and to keep me—and then you know what he would do? He’d drop me in the sea, or in some dark pit.”
I burst out laughing I’m sorry Inuyasha 🤣🤣 Maybe THIS IS his form of love because he kicked SHIN in the pool too. Maybe your dad Touga would’ve dropped you in a den of snakes and told you to fight them if he was still alive to parent you. I dunno but I gotta hear their accounts on this.
And speaking of Shin, I’m very interested to see how Inuyasha feels about him now that he knows the truth. Would he see Sesshoumaru in all of baby’s little quirks? Would his green-eyed hanyou-ness bother him, just as it bothered Sess a long time ago? Could he still love Shin as he is? I remember that he had issue early when Shin was born, that he was searching for traces of himself in Shin’s features. Hmmm
That’s exactly the kind of thing I think a demonic parent would do 🤣 Just dropkick the kid right into A Situation. They’ll figure it out.
*just as Inuyasha’s hanyouness bothered Sess
“And speaking of Shin, I’m very interested to see how Inuyasha feels about him now that he knows the truth.” – yepp lots of ways that this could go! Love hearing the questions you raise, oskorreia!
Thanks for sharing your thoughts on the scene!! <3
I think that my last review of the last chapter was right about Sesshoumaru. I think he did agree to this relationship to hurt Inuyasha in the future. I believe Sesshoumaru didn’t count on having feelings for her but he only wanted her to go with him so he could look at Inuyasha and knew he has something that Inuyasha wants. Kagome is foolish not to listen to Inuyasha this time because as Inuyasha said”where is he?” Sesshoumaru could be off doing who knows what with whomever! Personally, I’d stay in the future. I also think Sesshoumaru was just a little to over kill upset about Rin, something isn’t right about that. I think Rin probably knows Sesshoumaru only used her to. Sesshoumaru is not as innocent as he’s reacting. I wish you had another chapter ready but I am so happy for these two so quickly, Thanks.
So glad you’re enjoying the updates, Redwolf! Thanks for sharing your take on the situation! <3
If the whole ‘evil plot to get at you’ were true I’ll wear my clown shoes and wig once I hear it from the demon himself Inuyasha!!! Ain’t no way you’re gaslighting me into believeing that Sesshoumaru doesn’t love Kagome and Shin!!!
Also the bit about not wanting her to be a slave is so rich. The little dictator who had a thousand and one criticisms over what a good wife should be, who wanted her to greet him lovingly like a vapid little sweetheart whenever he deigns to come home, this guy? I don’t believe one word out of him
Right! I thought that was so ironic because the only humanizing part of their marriage is the wedding lol
Haha touché – his words and actions don’t exactly line up. So what is the real deal here?
Thanks for sharing your thoughts, sesshousimp! <3
*takes off glasses*
Where do I even begin….
I’m SO GLAD Kagome is starting to see how far gone Inuyasha is about her but not in a healthy way. I respect Inuyasha’s thought process when it comes to “branding” Kagome but he’s still a hanyou and the fact that he can’t admit to having or not having the urge to mate her says a lot…. Sesshomaru has way more control and strength than Inuyasha (outside of Tessaiga) and even he couldn’t resist the urge to make Kagome. Even still, he’s had all of these hints about Kagome and Sesshomaru and he’s STILL blaming everything on Sesshomaru despite Kagome admitting she approached him. It’s a bit sad to see how delusional he is but then you lose a bit of sympathy for him when he brings up a traumatic incident from his childhood, which he has every right to be upset about, but he hasn’t matured or healed enough to realize Sesshomaru isn’t that same person. It’s as if Inuyasha is trying to trauma-bond with Kagome right now but she knows better. If Sesshomaru didn’t care about his family, he would’ve flaunted his relationship with Kagome after the first tryst. He wouldn’t have risked having a hanyou out in the world just to spite Inuyasha. I think that realization hit Kagome when he pointed out that he’s not a human and yet he’s loved her as such, even letting her go along with her poorly planned idea of letting Inuyasha raise his son. I just hope Inuyasha’s delusions don’t deter Kagome from looking for Sesshomaru.
Awesome as always!!!
I like your analysis!
It’s rather telling that Inuyasha is outright denying Kagome any agency in what has transpired. He views her as some sort of idealised concept rather than an actual person–and this is perhaps why he’s been quick to point out every aspect where she doesn’t measure up to his ideal vision of a wife.
Sesshoumaru holds Kagome accountable for her actions and loves her despite her many flaws. Whereas Inuyasha seems to be in love with the concept of a doting wife rather than the flawed person inhabiting that role.
Thank you, BlackDevereaux!! You raise so many valid points 😉
It’s quite a tangled mess to unravel here. So many old wounds, new developments and conflicting personalities to consider.
Hope you enjoy how things play out from here! <3
I’m glad Kagome kept to her feelings and confessed them. I really hope she doesn’t go back with Inuyasha.
I wonder if Sesshomaru will come back. He HAS to!
Thanks so much for the update! Can’t wait for more.
Thank you, Kathy! So glad you enjoyed the update & are looking forward to seeing what happens next! <3
Wait a damn minute… is Inuyasha right in all this? The way he explained it… makes sense. Sesshomaru is a demon after all. But then that line “I have loved you like a man and have suffered for it” has me thinking otherwise. No. NO! Sesshomaru loves Kagome and Shin both. I won’t have it any other way. SKSKSKKSKS Char your writing is so good I’m actually trippin. I hope the half demons wrong in all this.
Also that bit about how Sesshomaru would come from the sky to collect Inuyasha only to drop his ass in the sea LMAOAODNSKKS. I feel so bad for Inuyasha sometimes that I forget he’s drunkenly abused Kagome in this fic. I just have the softest spot for him I can’t help it.
Thank you for this ❤️❤️❤️
Yepp everyone’s done some shitty things (except for Shin!), but I still feel for them too XD
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts & reactions, bella!! <3
WHEW BOY you are somethin. It’s giving me Tom Buchanan trying to convince Daisy that deep down she prefers him over Gatsby. But Inuyasha has less charm about it and more denial and delusion. Oh, babe. She’s already lost to you 🥲
Thank you, Inupapa!! I’m flattered by the Gatsby reference haha! <3
Hope you enjoy the next chapter!!
I think InuYasha knows Sesshoumaru wants Kagome and it’s not fully out of spite. This is InuYasha’s chance to finally get back at him after all of these years by planting the seed of doubt to try and turn Kagome against Sesshoumaru. Kagome may not want InuYasha anymore, but InuYasha is trying to do everything he can to make sure Sesshoumaru doesn’t get to keep her.
Well, we do know Inuyasha’s certainly not above being petty, that’s for sure…
Thanks so much for sharing your take on the scene, Blackberry! Hope you enjoy the next part <3
Wow 😮 I think Kagome really needs to consider a lot of things about both brothers. Sess was SO wrong to abandon her and Shin, and we know her and Inuyasha’s marriage was suffering too. She needs a time out from both! Inuyasha does make some interesting points. He seems harsh but not manipulative, I don’t know! Thank you for the update!
Yep she’s got a lot on her plate to consider, that’s for sure!
Thanks for sharing, Delys! <3
Part of me agrees Inuyasha is delusional, and the other part of me is like, he could be right though LMAO I mean I definitely think Sesshomaru developed feelings for Kagome, but maybe he didn’t go into the whole situation with the best of intentions.
Is Inuyasha really going to try to make this work?? That man is crazyyyy
I’m glad Kagome is doing her best to accept accountability. It seems like she really wants to try to do the right thing here, but the situation is just sooo messy
“It seems like she really wants to try to do the right thing here, but the situation is just sooo messy” – yepp she’s in a tough spot for sure…
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts on the scene, mim! Hope you enjoy the next <3
I needed to come back and comment because I’m doing a reread and came to a part where inuyasha is telling kagome how sess said “what marriage when inuyasha was thanking him for coming to their wedding. I think sess has always believe inu didn’t deserve kagome because he knows inu has been up to other things 👀 and to sess it wasn’t a marriage because inu didn’t end up mating kagome like sess has assumed he would. Gahhhh I could analyze all day, Char! I just feel like Inu is hiding stuff and these past few chapters you’ve posted really amplify that for me 👀👀