SessKag Series: The Pact, Part 35

This entry is part 35 of 177 in the series The Pact [Ongoing]

And now she could see it reflected in his eyes—

Six years of want, six years of waiting. Six years of restraint and careful calculation dissolved in that one unguarded moment, that one unvarnished glance of pure and unadulterated longing.

Kagome’s features crumpled in despair. “Sesshoumaru…”

He tightened his hold on her ankle. The tips of his claws pricked her skin like needle points. Leaning forward, he slipped his arms around her and unbound her wrists. Kagome’s arms fell limply to her sides. As he closed her yukata and tied it shut, her cold fingers latched to his collar. Hesitantly, she wet her parched, tingling lips. His touch lingered at her waist as he drew back.

“Sesshoumaru,” she whispered again, gazing up at him through the sheen of her tears. “…I wanted you, too.”

Her words left her on the wings of a sigh. Like the first full breath after breaking the surface, relief rushed into her as her confession rushed out. A fleeting euphoria that swept her up, swept her in, sweet and aching and tender as the press of his lips to hers.

She breathed him in as he kissed her, reveled in his stolen warmth like a winter flower touched by the first light of spring. Because she wasn’t his to have, and they both knew this even as she twined her arms around him and languished there in the heat of his presence. Tears gathered in her eyes anew, trailed burning down her cheeks.

In her chest there was the most exquisite, agonizing pain. It was splintering her. He was splintering her. As his hand fell to her hip, she knew where this would lead—and it would be the end of her.

A sound of raw distress escaped her as she broke away. “I can’t do this,” she wept, her nails digging into the silk of his hair and his clothes in pleading. “I can’t, I can’t…”

Her voice fell to a pitiful whimper. Her breath left her in shallow, raspy pants. As her anxiety heightened to a fever pitch, he took her by the arms and braced his cool brow against hers.

“I understand.”

Kagome’s eyes squeezed shut. Her shoulders shook as she breathlessly sobbed. Her hyperventilating lungs fought for air—until a sudden pulse from within her startled her into stillness. Frightened, she clutched at her lower stomach. Her eyes seized Sesshoumaru’s as her baby’s youki continued to flare.

His gaze fell to her womb, narrowing there. “It’s instinctual,” he said to her, after a moment of consideration. “The child senses your distress and would protect you.”

“Protect me?” Kagome asked faintly. “From what?”

His eyes returned to hers. “From me.”

“From you? But you’re—”

Even before she bit herself off, Sesshoumaru interjected, “The child knows only you.”

Kagome frowned as he released her and reined in his own youki entirely. Her grip tightened unconsciously over her stomach. It was a strange, vaguely unsettling thought—the idea that her unborn child would try to protect her.

“It’s a warning against demonic threats, nothing more,” Sesshoumaru explained, picking up on her obvious unease. “The child is projecting strength of bloodline.” Almost as an afterthought, he added, “For most, it would be enough.” As Kagome’s brow furrowed deeper, he draped his fur around her and guided her back against the tree. “Try to relax.”

In her fear for the baby, she hadn’t even noticed the sharp, edgy stirring of her own reiki. Breathing as slowly and deeply as she could, Kagome felt the turbulence of her power gradually subside. As the last of her tension finally bled away into Sesshoumaru’s soothing fur, the baby’s aura calmed as well.

All the while, Sesshoumaru sat beside her. His eyes never left her for an instant. She wondered what he thought of all this. If he had wanted her, had he wanted her child as well? Or had he simply viewed the baby as a means to an end?

If he had, did he still?

Even though he’d agreed to it, the fact remained that she was taking his own child—perhaps his wanted child—away from him.

“I’m sorry,” she said, her voice fraying at the thought. “I never m-meant for things to turn out like this. I…”

Her teeth clicked together as the words that she had never wanted this nearly tumbled out. Of course she had wanted this. She had wanted for her and her husband to have a child more than anything. All her thoughts and actions had been bent toward this goal.

They would have a family together, just like Sango and Miroku had. Just like her father and mother had once had—could have had to this day, if her father had been a better man.

This was the vision she had been striving for all her life. This was the dream she’d had since she was a young girl. There was nothing she wanted more. There couldn’t be.

Whatever dark place of doubt that thought had come from…that couldn’t be her.

“Your intentions and mine are no longer of importance.” Sternly, Sesshoumaru met her gaze. “You’re with child now. Acting recklessly is inexcusable.”

Kagome’s face fell. Her heart sank as she pulled his fur closer about her. “I won’t…do that again. I promise.” Timidly, she lifted her eyes to his. “In that moment…all I could think in that moment—” She cut off as the mere memory of that crushing grief robbed her of her breath. “After—after everything…the thought of you u-using me to get to Inuyasha—it was more than I could bear.”

Sesshoumaru’s jaw clenched as he looked away. “You should think better of me, Kagome.”

“I was scared.” Her trembling fingers touched to his claws. “…I’m still scared.”

He turned to her. His sharp eyes softened as he scanned her face. His hand clasped her own as he pulled her to him, fur and all.

“Don’t be afraid,” he murmured, holding her to his chest. “I will help you.”

Kagome melted against him. Peace transcended her at his assurance. She didn’t deserve his help, would never have dared ask it of him—no matter how desperately she knew she needed it. She thought more highly of him than she could ever say. Though the proper words to express it failed her, she hoped that he could hear it in her voice, just the same.

“…Thank you.”

All too soon, he was helping her to her feet. As she straightened and dusted off her yukata, he reassembled his partially mended armor. Her gaze trailed guiltily over each lingering dent and crack. Collecting her discarded sandals, she slipped them on as he turned to her, and led her once more through the wilderness.


Inuyasha © Rumiko Takahashi

Revised 10/6/22

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16 thoughts on “SessKag Series: The Pact, Part 35

  1. This was so tender and sweet. It feels like they are back to building a friendship and I love that. I really want a happy ending now!! I’m so worried this is all going to blow up in their faces! It totally is….I can feel it!!

    1. No matter what they have InuYasha to contend with. That won’t be pretty. Sweet chapter though!

  2. i’m happy!!!; she finally said what was in her heart as well. she wanted sesshoumaru too. i can see light at the end of the tunnel for our MCs. now, how to deal with inuyasha. i still think he knew he couldn’t have pups and put the pressure on kagome; saying it was her fault. yes, in the modern era women have difficultly getting pregnant, but it’s not always the woman who’s infertile. use that modern knowledge and show inuyasha that he aint always right b/c that would make him perfect and we know he’s not. i don’t want yasha to die or anything, just stop hurting kagome! maybe you could find him someone that sees him as he is and accepts him just like kags did. then he’ll know that its not just kagome who loves him as a hanyou. who knows maybe he’s just not compatible with kagome when it comes to having children/pups? i mean just b/c his dad and mom had him, doesn’t mean he and kags can make a baby, don’t you think? well its just a thought. keep up the great writing. c’ya’

    1. I really think Inuyasha would have similar issues as mules do. But that couldd also mean that Kagome and Sesshoumaru’s child will have the same problem as Inuyasha. 🤷 It’s interesting.

    2. Love the theories, candace!! Glad you’d like to see Inuyasha happy as well 😊 as much of a jerk as he is, he has a good heart deep down…

      Hope you like where the story goes from here!❤️❤️

  3. Well inuyasha is the product of that time and his Tragic childhood. He can’t help but be a chauvinistic jerk even if he saw Kagome’s world. Take care of the family how you’re supposed to! . He sees Kagome in a certain stay_at_home_perfect_wife that he is copying from we know what certain person. And he can’t see himself being the one unable to have kids in that macho way. That is why I am not a fan of the original pairing. Not that I hate inuyasha or anything. I like him but he needs loooooots of growing! I like your portrayal of Sesshomaru like crazy and after analysing their situation hmm….. Its tricky. I can see certain self sacrificing tendencies and wishes for the greatest good from the newly parents but I believe inuyasha will explode the issue in the most impossible and trafic way with his callous mouth and temper.
    I loved this chapter but I felt the surge of inevitability growing faster. Kagome will not abandon inuyasha not until he would do something major. And he will we all can predict that but the question is how will Kagome react. Did she think it would be easy to live her whole life with such a secret? What about inuyasha’s nose? Also As a modern woman she should know about genetics and Sesshomaru’s moon is certainly from his mom.
    In this situation I would go to inuyasha and confess while keeping a barrier around myself and a certain dog closer but it is never as easy in life or novels lol. We can expect lots of dramas and wringing of hands while startling at inuyasha’s each word. Good luck Kagome cause you need it.
    Thx for updating! Lovely chapter!

    1. Haha thanks, Natalia!! Absolutely loved hearing your take on this chapter and where the story might go from here! So glad you’re enjoying my portrayal of Sesshoumaru in this fic 😊

      I agree that Inuyasha is pretty rough around the edges. He needs some growing for sure 😊

      Thanks again and hope you enjoy the next updates!! ❤️

  4. A chapter of tenderness between Kagome and Sesshomaru after her confession to him about her want of him also.

    So now that Kagome has picked up the ball, by virtue of her confession, what will she do now? Sesshomaru is in her corner now and he will stand by whatever decision she makes. I’m sure both realize that she will have to tell Inuyasha the truth. Both Sesshomaru and their child will not let anything happen to her. I believe he really loves her and their pup. He has shown it in his own quirky Sesshomaru ways.

    I hope that the two can come up with a contingency plan in case everything goes south, and it will, when Yasha is told or he finds out about the betrayal. Well with that…good luck Sessho and Kagome, you’re going to need it.

    I loved this chapter Char. Excellent writing as usual. 🙂

    1. Thanks so much, Cheryl!! Loved this observation: “He has shown it in his own quirky Sesshomaru ways.” lol so true 😆 gotta love him!

      So happy you enjoyed the sweetness in this chapter! But the story’s not over yet of course 😉

      Hope you enjoy where the plot goes from here! ❤️

  5. ahh, the love of a youkai who will do anything to save you from yourself, even tying you up with your own clothes. it’s beautiful.

    these are my favorite kind of romances. two stubborn, POWERFUL forces nearing a knock-down drag out before the two cool off and talk logically. honestly, there’s no other way to do it. anger, violence, irrationality… they all happen naturally and to find someone who can match you, understand and accept you, and have a logical conversation after it’s all out of the way? that’s my kind of perfect.

    i’m really glad that they sorta kinda made up and have come to an understanding. sesshoumaru rethought his stance and is choosing to stand by her no matter what. which is the honorable man he really is deep down.

    1. Hahaha glad you liked that tying her up bit! 😉 Your favorite kind of romances are my favorite kind, too! Gotta love a good power struggle ❤️

      It’s been fun writing Sess as the hero in this story – so often in fics, especially mine, this is not quite the case 😅

      Thanks for sharing, and hope you like what comes next!!❤️❤️

  6. Ha! See? I KNEW it!

    All gloating aside, this was a much needed sweet lifting to the mood. I…really hate that I want her to just run away with Sesshoumaru and leave Inuyasha behind. But…we all know Kags…this is going to get a whole lot worse before it gets better…

  7. This chapter was just so sweet! Though my favourite part was where the unborn child protected its mother. How adorable!!!
    If Kagome would open her eyes, she would see that Sesshoumaru is offering her everything she ever wanted: a husband that loves and respects her and a child. And it seems that Sesshoumaru is not only offering but also letting the decision to Kagome.
    And it saddens me to think about the consequences. Kagome will not be able to break up with Inuyasha this easily. That means that Sesshoumaru will lurke in the shadows, protecting the ones he loves while being seperated from his child. He deserves to be a part of the pregnancy!
    Poor Sesshoumaru. Also I can wait for the confrontation between Kagome and Inuyasha. I’m streesed out and just want to get over it. Poor me. 🙂

    1. So glad you liked this chapter and the part where Kagome’s baby protected her in particular! 😊

      It still seems Kagome has a way to go. And a confrontation of some sort is inevitable in this kind of situation…

      Thanks for commenting and hope you enjoy the next part of the story! ❤️

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