No.
No, no, no.
This was wrong. Worse than wrong.
Kagome tore her lips from Sesshoumaru’s with an anguished gasp. Her cramped hands jerked down to his chest. Frantically, she shoved against him.
“Let go of me!” she hissed out, thrashing in desperation. Panic seized her at the lingering feel of him inside her. “Let me down—let me down right now!”
In the wake of her sexual high, reality was crashing down on her with gravitational force. Guilt rose up to meet her, crushing the air from her lungs as Sesshoumaru set her feet to the floor. Her stomach roiled as his hot wet flesh streaked across her belly. The overflow of his release threaded down her thighs. On trembling legs she staggered past him to the door. Leaning against its frame a moment for support, she swallowed dryly before hurling herself outside.
Kagome collapsed to her knees in the parched, prickly grass. The blinding sun scorched down upon her. Despite the brutal heat, cold sweat broke out across her brow. Gooseflesh sprouted on her skin. She could feel the shame and self-disgust welling up within her. Her eyes blurred as the sensation wracked her in nauseating waves.
And then, just when she thought she could bear no more, the sickness overtook her at last, spilling out of her onto the grass below. It seemed like it would never stop. But finally, mercifully, it did. Weakly, she rolled over onto her side. Her shoulders shook in helpless little spasms. Her nose and eyes wept freely. The acrid taste of bile stung in her panting mouth. The proof of her betrayal still slicked the junction of her thighs, most unseemly of all.
Her sinful skin baked in the glare of the sun. Her tears vaporized, leaving caustic trails on her cheeks. Boneless and defeated, she lay there for what seemed like forever, wallowing in the burning hell she had pitched herself into—until a cool shadow slanted over her in reprieve.
“Come back inside,” Sesshoumaru said.
His claws curved around her upper arm. Half-dragging her, he led her back into the shelter of the hut.
The moment she stumbled sluggishly across that dark threshold again, Kagome realized her true hell lay inside these four loathsome walls. Reeling, she pressed herself flat against the decaying slats. A piteous whimper escaped her as a wave of illness swept over her again.
Her head swam. Her breathing quickened. Her mouth went perilously dry. A firm grip on her shoulders guided her down to the uneven floor. Her arms went around her knees as she doubled over with a helpless moan. Dimly, she felt Sesshoumaru leave the hut. Her bleary eyes lifted toward him a minute later, when he returned and pressed a dark chalky chip into her palm.
Kagome slipped the medicinal bark into her mouth and began to chew. Her head tilted back in relief as her nausea abated—physically, at least. Within her heart and mind there was still a wretched churning, a turbulence of emotion so violent and confused that her whole body shook as she struggled to contain it.
“Here,” he said, setting something down beside her.
It clattered faintly as he joined her on the floor. Swallowing, she peeked over to find a canteen of water and a pack of crackers—staples of her Feudal Era travels since she was fifteen years old. With twitching fingers, she uncapped the canteen and raised it to her lips. Her shivers gradually subsided as she drank in small, measured sips.
“You should eat,” he prompted her after a while, when the crackers remained untouched.
Kagome looked away. “I’m not hungry.”
She hadn’t been hungry all day.
“Eat,” he said again, his tone leaving no room for argument.
Sulkily, Kagome complied. The first bite was the hardest, but after that, her reluctant appetite began to stir. The crackers disappeared one after the next in rapid succession. Kagome glanced up sharply when a hooked claw dragged the package away. Golden eyes met hers, level and cool.
“That’s enough for now.”
Kagome’s shoulders slouched. With no other recourse, she took up the bottle of water again, regarding him warily as she nursed it. Cross-legged Sesshoumaru sat before her. His wicked claws rested lightly on his knees, his expression inhumanly intent as he regarded her in the low light of the hut. It was unnerving, having the full, uncanny force of his attention riveted on her. She had the distinct impression he was studying her, biding his time as he loomed there, cataloguing her like prey.
Steeling herself, Kagome set the empty bottle aside as she locked her gaze with his. “What happened between us just now—that was a mistake.”
“You seemed quite eager to make it.”
Kagome flushed. His easy manner infuriated her almost as much as the remark itself. “It was just pregnancy hormones,” she bit out. As he stared at her in question, she elaborated tersely, “Temporary insanity.”
“Is that how you explain it,” Sesshoumaru said musingly, as if to himself.
Kagome’s face scalded anew as she lurched to her feet, yanking her unzipped backpack up by its strap. He was humoring her, perhaps even toying with her. Regardless, she didn’t appreciate the condescension in the slightest. Angrily, she turned toward the door—only to find him blocking her path once more. Her hold on her yellow backpack became a death-grip.
“Let me through, Sesshoumaru,” she seethed.
To her intense frustration, he remained rooted to the spot. “And where is it,” he asked narrowly, “that you propose to go?”
“To the monastery,” she ground out. “That’s where I was headed before you cornered me here, and that’s where I’m going—just like I intended to from the start.”
When he still refused to stand aside, she attempted to skirt by him. The bar of his arm halted her, his claws connected solidly to the frame.
“You are not going to that monastery.”
Kagome retreated a step as he moved in toward her. His eyes glinted with a surety that left her desolate. The hand holding up her backpack trembled as it sank. Her lower lip and lashes quivered as well. Almost consolingly, Sesshoumaru reached out and cupped the side of her face. The tip of his thumbnail caught her first hopeless teardrop as it fell.
“You never were,” he said.
Inuyasha © Rumiko Takahashi
Revised 8/15/22
Oh no!!!! Don’t stop.. I must know what happens next. We’re gonna ride this train until the wheels fall off. Kagome is driving me nuts, by the way!! Ugh!! But you know that.. don’t you Char😑😒 lolol
choo choo! okay, full steam ahead then!! 😀
yeah Kagome’s kiiiiind of the worst XD
thanks so much, DevaG!! <3
;____; he’s so observant, remembering that crackers are good for nausea. Even though I don’t support affairs… But gosh darn it, Kagome, there’s a keeper right there ;___;
I wish she would have broken it off with Inuyasha before this -___- Then I wouldn’t be so morally conflicted -_______-
But that would be easy.
Gotta love that angst XD
And yeah, caring!Sess…I just can’t resist! <3
Thank you for the awesome chapters!! 🙂 They made my day(s)
Aww you’re so very welcome, Ri! Thank you!! 🙂
<3
Kagome needs to own up to her failings and find the strength to face the incoming disaster. The baby she wanted is on the way. This is not about her anymore.
Inuyasha is lost to her. He might even try to kill her. Their marriage is over and she will likely be booted out of the village. Back then, women who strayed from their marriage vows were treated more harshly than men. She’s supposed to be a miko too.
Her actions will affect other people. Rin may not be welcome at the village anymore because Sesshomaru is her guardian. The Lord of the West will become persona non grata there especially if Inuyasha decides to stay in the village.
Miroku, Sango and Shippo will have to decide who they will side with.
There is also no guarantee Sesshomaru will stay given the way Kagome is treating him. Remember, she has never told him she cares about him. She’s subjected him to guilt trips, anger, frequent crying jags and even blamed him when it is she who proposed this deal in the first place. Sure, he used it to get what he wanted but she kept seeing him too.
It takes two to make a baby.
Lol Kagome has certainly put Sesshoumaru through the ringer…poor guy D:
Of course you’re absolutely right about the fact that the baby has to come first. If anyone’s truly innocent in all this mess, it’s the child.
And LOVE hearing your thoughts on the inevitable fall-out! It’s certainly hard to envision a scenario in which Inuyasha and Sesshoumaru don’t come to blows over this. D:
Thanks so much for sharing your take, Doug! Love picking your brain, as always hehe 🙂 <3
No no pls more of the pact im hooked on this amazing story so real so raw!!!! How you portray the abuse she suffers… her agony, the justification is so amazing!!!!
Aw thanks so much!! So glad to hear you’re enjoying this tragic tale and its portrayals! <3
The Pact has been so addicting to me lately…so we'll see! Thanks again! 🙂
I love how you portray the characters, and your writing in general keeps my hooked word for word like no other writers has, I check every day for an update; it’s safe to say your writing is my crack! It’s even worse now that I am out of work for at least the next month because I just had spine and brain surgery. I love transgressions but The Pact has its claws dug deep 😍
Thank you so much, dear – you are just too kind!! <3 It's so wonderful to hear that you're enjoying this story so much – I'll admit it's gotten me hooked too XD
Best wishes recovering from your surgery – hope you get a lot of great rest and feel better very soon! <3
Kagome really needs to stop lying to herself.
Everyone don their raincoats for the shit storm!
Hurticane’s a-coming!!!!
Lolol incoming! XD
<3
I…love this. And it hurts so much. Because I WANT them to BE TOGETHER. But doing so…means they have destroyed a marriage. Happy or not. As a very happily married woman, this story is soooooo hard on my heart. (Not a bad thing! I don’t enjoy perfect relationships in stories without struggle or pain.)
Honestly, I don’t think Inuyasha is the biggest victim here. It’s a toss up between Sesshoumaru, who ACTUALLY loves Kagome and not the idea of her because of Kikyo, and this poor baby they made. I can’t imagine Inuyasha would ever do anything but try to kill the baby once he finds out it’s not his…
Waaah! :'( I think you’ve hit the nail on the head…I’m also blessed to be in a happy relationship, and just imagining the flip-side of that is so heart-wrenching… D:
But I’m glad to hear that it makes for a compelling read :’)
Man, there’s so many victims in this story (innocent or otherwise lol), but I’m on board with you – especially about the poor little baby, of course 🙁
Thanks so much for sharing your thoughts, dear!! <3
Me after reading Pt.18&19: 🎉😘
Me reading this chapter: nooooo 😢😭
I have expected Kagome to feel guilty after the reality hit her. But I thought she could at least admit her desires. I’m not prepared for her to act this way. 🙁
I understand that she is torn between her heart and fidelity. Still, it is beyond frustrating to watch her torment herself and Sesshoumaru, even Inuyasha.
Is there any chapter where you have not tormented our poor Sess? 😂
btw, he is so caring in this chapter, i can’t help but think he will make a good dad.
Lol so sorry to make you sad!! 😢 yeahhhh…I really have a thing for making characters frustrating/miserable, don’t I? Gotta love that angst XD
Glad you liked caring Sesshoumaru! ❤️😊 Thanks so much for sharing, Doris!!